Deep Stuff
by ZeGreatM
Summary: Dipper and Mabel have a little chat on the roof after the events of a certain failed sock opera. (Yes, this is post Sock Opera fluff)(One-shot)
AN: I find myself constantly thinking about post "Sock Opera" things, so here's a fic to vent my pain.

Mabel's eyes flew open, something jolting her unexpectedly from her sleep. She blinked, brow furrowing as she wondered what could have woken her. She felt wary, strange, like something wasn't right. Could she have been having a nightmare?

Nah, that wasn't likely. Mabel never had nightmares, and on the rare occasion she did, they were never bad enough to give her the unsettled feeling she had now.

Maybe it was a weird noise? Yeah, that made more sense. It was probably just Grunkle Stan rummaging around for some food or doing some weird old man stuff. She knew it wasn't Dipper because the lights were out and she could hear the rhythmic sounds of his snoring coming from the other side of the room.

Except, the snores weren't coming from the other side of the room.

She glanced down at the curled up form of Waddles nestled at her feet. Rumbling pig-snores echoed from his adorable little mouth, his precious little hooves brought up by his head and a look of utter contentment on his face.

A little squeal erupted out of Mabel at his piggy-cuteness before she clapped a hand over her mouth to stop it.

Of course the snores weren't coming from Dipper. He never snored, but Waddles always did. But she didn't have any time to think about that, because what she was looking at right now was prime scrapbook material. She groped for the camera she kept on her bedside table, but her hand found nothing but empty-space. Dang it, where was her camera?

Any moment now, Waddles would shift to a different position and this cuteness would be lost for all eternity, never to return again. There was no time to lose!

She swiveled toward Dipper's side of the room, mouth open and ready to plead with him to help her find her camera before it was forever too late.

That was when she remembered it was the middle of the night. Also that she was awake because of what she assumed was a strange noise. And even more important that all this, she realized that her twin brother was not in his bed where he should be.

She paused, staring at the messed up bedclothes and empty bed for a moment. Before she rolled her eyes and continued to search for her camera.

He had probably just gone to the bathroom and run into something along the way. She grinned, imagining the half-asleep form of her brother stumbling to the bathroom and running into a table or something equally clumsy and completely him.

But that was when she saw that Dipper's hat and vest were missing from their usual place at the foot of his bed. With a startling flash of clarity, she remembered everything that had happened yesterday with her brother and her completely failed sock-opera and Gabe and Bill and _Bipper._

She also remembered that Dipper never got up in the middle of the night unless he was sick or he'd had a nightmare. And with everything that had happened yesterday, neither of those options were out of the question.

She leaped out of the covers and onto her feet in one smooth movement. Her eyes locked on Dipper's table and she noted with relief that the journal was still there. The last thing she wanted her brother doing was more research or whatever nerdy stuff he did when what he really should be doing was getting some rest, sickness or nightmares or not.

But even though the journal was where it should be, her brother was not. And he was hurt and tired and what if Bill had come back...

She shook her head furiously to get rid of these ridiculous thoughts.

"Come on, Mabes," she muttered to herself. "Worrying is for Dipper. Stepping forward with a smile on your face and getting the job done is your area of expertise!"

Taking a deep breath, she stepped off of the bed, casting one more glance at Waddles before she left the room. The moment of cuteness would just have to be lost.

Her sock clad feet padded swiftly along the wooden floor of the house as she searched for her brother. Her first stop was the bathroom, but he wasn't there. Next she tried the kitchen, but that was empty as well. She checked the living room, the hallways, the gift shop, she even managed a peek into Grunkle Stan's room, but he wasn't there, he wasn't anywhere.

A sigh escaped her mouth as she tried to fight down her rising worry. She had come back up to the attic and planted herself on the window seat, her chin cupped in her hands, lips pursued in concentration.

She shouldn't be worried. She was the great Mabel Pines, capable of conquering any fear with a never-ending supply of cheer, glitter, and yarn! If she could do that, then she could find her missing twin.

But she'd looked _everywhere!_ Where could he possibly be?

 _Ding._

A light clicked on in Mabel's mind. She grinned and ran down the stairs as fast as she dared while still being quiet. There was one place she hadn't looked yet, and she had a pretty good feeling that was where he was.

Carefully, quietly she sneaked up the ladder that led to the roof. One she'd reached the top, she climbed to the top and raised her head just enough to peek over the rim. A relieved grin tugged at her mouth when she saw the hunched-over form of her brother in the moonlight, sitting motionlessly on the platform.

The platform floor creaked loudly as she walked over to him. She settled down on his right wordlessly as she thought of the right amount of cheer to slather on without overwhelming him. Judging from the fact that his face was completely hidden under his hat and he hadn't so much as glanced in her direction, he had probably had a nightmare. And when it was this bad, she had to be very careful with what she said so she didn't send him "over the edge", as Mom and Dad had said last time this had happened. Of course, the last time this had occurred was back when they were both nine and they had watched Toy Story 3 and Dipper had gotten scared that Lots-O'Huggin' Bear was going to eat him and his toys. After the events of today, Mabel was pretty sure that this was a little worse.

She gulped, staring at Dipper's unmoved form. Yep, this was definitely going to take some thought.

His knees were brought up to his chest, arms wrapped firmly around them, head somewhere between his legs and his body. She could just see the white bandages wrapped around his left arm and the bruises that ran down all the way to his wrist. In her mind she could see the other bruises and cuts on his back and legs, and the giant goose egg on the back of his head.

Anger rushed through her as she stared at her brother. This was all Bill's fault. That low-down, good for nothing, triangular poop-face! Mabel didn't often have the desire to punch things, but when she thought about that stupid triangle she did. She'd hit him right in his fat eye if she could.

Dipper shifted slightly, wrapping his arms a little tighter around his legs. He sniffed quietly, but it was loud enough that Mabel didn't miss it.

Was he crying? She couldn't remember that last time he had cried. This was bad, this was super-duper not good. She was definitely going to need to ration her cheer carefully.

He still hadn't even glanced at her yet, had hardly even moved. If it wasn't for the almost imperceptible rise and fall of his shoulders she wouldn't have even known if he was breathing.

As the two of them sat in silence, the only sounds coming from the forest around them, part of Dipper wanted Mabel to just leave him alone. It was just a dumb nightmare! He didn't want her to see him upset like this, especially over something so stupid. He was fine, he didn't need anyone to tell everything was okay or any of that. He just wanted to be alone for awhile.

Or at least, that was what he told himself. He sniffed again, burying his face a little deeper into his legs and hoping Mabel hadn't noticed and that she would just go away, or maybe not, maybe it would be better if she stayed...

Mabel certainly did hear this second sniffle, and she came to the conclusion that it was time to stop thinking. She lived by the standard that jumping into things without much thought was almost always a great idea, and this time wasn't any different.

"Whatcha doin' out here, bro-bro?"

Her voice was gentle, hardly loud enough to break the silence. Dipper jumped as if she'd shouted it.

He gulped noisily and cleared his throat.

"Oh, you know. Just thinking." His voice cracked and shook when he spoke.

"'Bout what?" Mabel prodded, sliding a little closer to her brother.

He shrugged. "Stuff."

Not good, not good, not good. She hesitated for a brief moment, wondering if she should say what she wanted to or if it would be an over-the-edge-sender. Dipper sat there, half of him wanting her to say it, and the other half hoping she wouldn't.

"You thinkin' about what happened today?"

There, she said it.

Silence for what felt like an eternity.

Then a shrug and a grunt from the Dipper-lump.

"Kind of."

Mabel wanted to remind him of the talk they'd had about giving better answers, but now wasn't the time.

"Kind of?"

Dipper sighed deep and long, loosening the tension in his shoulders that Mabel hadn't noticed before.

"It's not a big deal, Mabel, really."

His voice was muffled behind his knees, but Mabel didn't need to hear it clearly to know that it was thick with tears and that was most certainly a big deal, thank you very much, Dipper Pines.

She carefully put a hand on his shoulder, painfully aware of the bruises just under his clothes.

"Hey Dipper."

She paused, waiting for some kind of response.

His head shifted toward her, just enough that she could see that faint outline of his face in the moonlight.

Putting on her best, most encouraging, most Mabel-y smile, she continued.

"You know, plain ol' siblings are pretty good at sharing stuff with each other, but twins are even better at it. And sometimes you might not want to talk about something, but you always feel better after you do."

She let her smile get a little wider, a little more encouraging.

The lump-that-was-Dipper stayed perfectly still for a moment. She heard him swallow, watched as the glint of his eyes disappeared as he blinked.

Then, finally...

"I had a bad dream."

He had a feeling that she probably had already figured this out by now, but it was an easy way to ease into the conversation that he knew was coming.

He spoke so quietly that Mabel could hardly hear him through the muffling powers of his legs and the faint night-time noises coming from below.

She nodded, far from surprised at this.

"Was it about that crazy triangle?" She prodded when he didn't continue.

He visibly winced at the mention of that stupid thing and nodded.

There was another moment of silence as Mabel tried to think of how to get her brother to open up without making him freak out. Dipper didn't think that was possible. Unless he decided to speak first.

"He was in my body again."

Dipper had turned his head completely away from her, but his face wasn't buried quite as deeply into his knees.

"It was just the same stuff that happened today, but this time everything didn't turn out alright."

Mabel could see his face clearly now. Wide eyes stared up at the night sky, the dark circles under them still as prominent as the day before, cuts and bruises framing his pale face.

"Bill got the journal this time. He destroyed it, right there in front of me and I couldn't to anything."

He was getting more animated now, giving his arms a helpless shake to emphasize his point. Mabel didn't miss the way he winced when he jerked his injured arm a little too hard.

He stopped talking, arms wrapped back around his legs again. There was something about the way his shoulders tensed up and how his throat started working that told Mabel he wasn't finished yet.

"But I didn't care about any of that." He whispered. "He could have burned the journal a hundred times and I wouldn't have cared."

Mabel squinted at him. Well, this was odd.

Dipper swallowed loudly and looked into her eyes for the first time that night,

"He killed you, Mabel. I watched him as he took my hands and he..."

His voice broke. Biting down on his lip in an attempt to fight off the tears, he stared at his sister with watery, fear-filled eyes.

"I killed you."

The sentence ended in a sob that sent the first tear rolling down his cheek. He took a shuddering breath and pushed forward before Mabel could say anything, a note of hysteria creeping into his voice.

"It's all my fault. I should have never made that deal with Bill in the first place. I should have listened to the journal, I should have never let him into my mind and now it's too late."

The hysteria was turning into full-blown panic now. His gaze darted around wildly, looking anywhere but at his sister, breaths coming in short gasps.

 _It's all my fault, it's all my fault, it's all my-_

"Dipper, what the heck? Calm down, will ya?"

Mabel's startled and somehow commanding voice drew Dipper back to reality. He started and glanced over at her, mouth still gaping open in whatever he was about to say. He looked confused, almost as if he'd forgotten he wasn't still stuck in the dream and that Mabel wasn't dead and everything was okay.

Closing his mouth, he cleared his throat and blinked uncomfortably against the sting in his eyes. Was that from tears or from what had happened in the kitchen?

Mabel was starting to get worried and there was no pushing it aside this time.

"It was just a dream, dummy, nothing to worry about. We took care of that crazy triangle dude, the journal's safe and I'm just alive and me as ever!"

She threw in an extra wide grin and lifted her shoulders up.

"So there's no reason for you to..."

The look Dipper was giving her was enough to put her cheerfulness on a temporary hold.

Past the tears swimming around their red-rims and spilling over onto his cheeks, there was so much guilt in his eyes that it made Mabel start to wonder if he really _had_ killed her.

"You don't understand," he croaked. "I know it was just a dream, but, but it wasn't! I actually let Bill into my mind. He was literally inside of my body while I floated around and watched him wreak havoc on it!"

Mabel could see memories of the things he'd told her about flash across his face. The stairs, the kitchen, the forks, the cuts and bruises...

"You could have really died, Mabel!"

His voice rose to a choked shout that silenced some of the forest noises.

"We could have all died because I made a stupid mistake. It would have been _all my fault._ "

The words ripped their way out his throat, tearing at his guilt-ridden heart like knives. Mabel flinched at their force, looking at her brother with a mixture of fear and concern on her face.

Dipper's ragged breaths were the only noise that filled the silence as the twins stared at each other.

Mabel hadn't seen her brother this freaked out in a long time. No, no that was wrong. This was a while new level of freaked out, something untouched and so intense that it was more than she'd expect even from Dipper. She could see him shaking, his eyes were wide and bloodshot and so haunted that he didn't even look like her brother anymore. And he was crying. Dipper never cried, not that she ever saw at least. He was always too worried about her to let her see him like that.

But this completely broke that unspoken rule, shattered it in a million-zillion pieces.

For once, Mabel was at a complete loss for words.

One look at her face was all it took for him to realize that he'd just gone over the edge again. He abruptly stopped panting, biting down on his lip with an embarrassed look creeping onto his face. Mabel looked almost _scared_ at how distraught he was. That just made the guilt worse and before he had even realized it he'd curled back up again, hiding his tear-stained face behind his knees.

He missed the steely resolve that filled his sister's eyes when he did.

She put her hand back on his shoulder, ignoring the way he flinched away from her when she did.

"Listen up, Dippers."

The calm strength in her usually cheerful voice was enough to make him glance over at her.

"I am going to be completely, painfully honest with you, even though I don't want to and I just want to say that everything's fine and what happened today wasn't a big deal and now it's over and all of those wonderful, nice things. But I'm not going to."

Mabel paused. She had her brother's full attention now.

"All that sad junk you said earlier was kinda right. You were the one who let Bill take control or whatever and you did pretty much annihilate my show."

She wasn't missing the hurt look in Dipper's eyes, but she pushed on, hoping he wouldn't start hating her until she was finished.

"Though, the whole thing with the rockets and the fire and all the things that went _BOOM_ were my fault. But the point is, bro, that it doesn't really matter."

Dipper raised an eyebrow at this and opened his mouth to say something, but Mabel held up a hand to stop him, teeth gritted in determination.

"Just hear me out! What I'm trying to say is that we all make mistakes. Remember that time I destroyed the magical mailbox in the forest by putting in the video of me stuffing gummy worms up my nose? Or when I told Gideon I'd go on a date with him?"

The twins shuddered simultaneously, a look of disgust coming over both of their faces.

"Yeah, that wasn't your best decision." Dipper mumbled.

"So true! That one almost got us killed to. And there are like, a ba-jillion more mistakes I've made I could say. But even worse than any of those was when I didn't help you out with that computer when I told you I would."

Mabel's tone was completely serious now. It could have just been the moonlight playing tricks on him, but Dipper could have sworn he saw regret in her eyes.

"So the whole mess was kind of my fault to. But in the end, everything did turn out mostly alright, even though we both messed up."

Her gaze flickered down to the bandages on her brother's arm and she gave a mental emphasize on the word 'mostly'.

"You can't stay stuck on your mistakes, bro-bro! You gotta just keep moving on or life is gonna be a whole lot less awesome. You get what I'm trying to say?"

Dipper blinked at his sister as her eyes bored into him, waiting for a response.

"Wow, Mabel. That was really... Deep."

She grinned. "I know, right?! I don't even know where that came from."

There was a moment of silence, both of the twins staring at each other. Before Dipper could stop it, before he even realized it, a chuckle had escaped his mouth.

Taking the chuckle as a sign that her brother was back to normal, she let her grin grow extra wide, all the concern and regret gone so fast Dipper wondered if it had ever been there at all.

Letting her hand fall off of his shoulder, Mabel turned her gaze to the stars above them. Her face was happy, content, back to how it always was and how it always should be.

"Hey, Mabel?"

She looked back at her brother, her lips pursued questioningly.

Dipper scooted at little closer, crossing his legs and planting his hands behind him for support.

"Thanks. You know, for all of that deep stuff."

He shot her a smile before letting his eyes wander up to the night sky.

"No problem, bro-bro. Can you show me where the big dipper is again?"

"Yeah." He pointed up near the horizon. "It's right..."

"There!"

Mabel lunged over and gave his forehead a gentle poke. She giggled and Dipper let out a groan.

"Doesn't that ever get old?" He asked, rubbing his forehead and glaring at her in mock irritation.

"Nope!"

A ridiculously wide grin adorned her face. Dipper tried to groan again, but it turned into a laugh half-way through. Soon the sounds of the twins mirth echoed around the forest by the Mystery Shack, silencing the usual noises and replacing them with the sound of something much better.


End file.
